Happy birthday to the man, Bernie Sanders
In his honor, let us never forget this iconic moment:
real actual Seinfeld stuff
- we all joke about queer Seinfeld but let's not forget the canon queer Seinfeld when Elaine notices a couple of young women eavesdropping on them from the adjacent booth at the restaurant and, to mess with them, asks George and Jerry when they're gonna come out of the closet bc it's ok to be out and gay now. George plays along whole Jerry just huffs. one of the young women was an NYU student who was supposed to interview Jerry for a thing and she ends up writing an article about their gay relationship despite their insisting it was a joke, bc due to the way they actually act with each other, the fact that they're both in their 30s and don't have wives/girlfriends, and some faulty 90s phone technology she doesn't believe they aren't gay.
- also every single time they deny being gay they add "NOT THAT THERES ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT! it's totally fine and natural and it's nobody else's business what your sexuality is!" or some variation. this was the 90s
- the time they were at a piano recital for Jerry's girlfriend and during her performance, he inexplicably balanced his pez dispenser on Elaine's knee, sending her into a giggle fit. the girlfriend mistook it for someone laughing at her performance and became so depressed she quit piano.
- the entire episode they spent in the lobby of a Chinese restaurant waiting to be seated. bonus: Elaine was dared to go up to a table where a bunch of posh looking older folks were sitting and just take one of their wontons and eat it. she made it to the table but could not take the wonton.
- that one guy who only spoke about himself in third person
- George's fiancee who he was engaged to for a whole season before she, suddenly and without much fanfare, died from licking envelopes.
- the time George pitched Jerry on a sitcom that is about nothing
- the time Elaine spotted a mannequin in a department store that looked a lot like her and demanded to know where it came from or to take it home. she was harshly rebuffed and the next time she went to the store the clerk had posed the Elaine mannequin so that it was being bent over the knee of a male mannequin being spanked.
- the bubble boy
- the time they made a bet on who could go the longest without masturbating. they made Elaine put in more because "it's easier for a woman to not" but she was the second to lose (after Kramer, who didn't even last 12 hours)
- the time Kramer came up with the idea for a male bra called a "bro" after seeing George's dad shirtless old man titties
- George worked for the New York Yankees for like. the latter half of the series. and, despite an absolutely abysmal prior work history, was somehow so beloved there that he was UNABLE to get fired even when he was trying to.
- Elaine's bad dancing where she did funny little kicks
- Jerry got a huge check from some shows so he was very nice and bought his dad a Cadillac. this led to his dad being ousted from his position as the president of the condo association. oh wait that was also because Jerry had stolen a loaf of marble rye from one of the other members (a very old lady) in a previous episode.
- the time they got lost in a parking garage
- the season finale where they're all sentenced to a year of prison for just being assholes. like they didn't actually COMMIT a crime they were just being assholes in general.
- (specifically they witnessed a crime and instead of doing anything made jokes about the victims weight. they were not in new York city at this time)
feel free to add your favorite Seinfeld things
how could I forget
- Jerry's dentist has newly converted to Judaism and is telling jew jokes (in the vein of "how many x does it take to screw in a lightbulb" or "an x, y and z walk into a bar"). Jerry suspects he only converted so that he could tell those jokes and brings this up with a Catholic priest (I forget why exactly?). the priest says "and this offends you as a Jewish person?" to which Jerry replies "no, it offends me as a comedian!"
- the episode where Elaine gets a new bf and they can't figure out if he's black or not and know it would be rude to just ask. Elaine thinks he confirms that he Is when he refers to them as an interracial couple but then it turns out he thought she was Hispanic. they both finally figure out they're just 2 white people. and they follow up that realization with the line "wanna go to the Gap?"
another run through the washer will fix me
girl i shrunk
